EVERYTHING IS RACIST: Ole Miss Cancels Greek Life Outing Over Banana Peel

We’ve learned in recent weeks that many objects and surnames, previously deemed morally acceptable, now fall into the realm of intense and glaring racism. The latest object deemed racially insensitive by frantic leftists, ensconced in mass hysteria, was a banana peel, left in a tree by a student who was unable to find a trash can.

Campus Reform is reporting that over the weekend, the University of Mississippi cancelled their Greek Life retreat, after “a banana peel was found hanging in a tree”.

How ominous.

Ryan Swanson, a student at Ole Miss, quickly accepted responsibility, claiming that his only intention was getting rid of the banana peel after failing to locate a trash can. According to Townhall, “three black students found the banana peel – and were apparently triggered by what they saw”.

The Daily Mississippian notes that the discovery of the banana peel came only moments after the conclusion of a race relations discussion among the college students: “Saturday morning, all of the retreat’s participants ate breakfast together, followed by a session where they shared their feelings on race relations at Ole Miss. The breakfast options included a fruit cart with bananas.” No word yet from the publication on whether crackers were also available.

Makala McNeil, one of the students who discovered the banana peel, and president of a historically black sorority, told the Daily Mississippian, “The overall tone was heavy. I mean, we were talking about race in Mississippi, at the University of Mississippi and in the Greek community, so there’s a lot involved”.

Fearing for the emotional safety of their students, administrators made the decision to end the event. Per Campus Reform, Interim Director of Fraternity and Sorority Life, Alexa Lee Arndt, “explained that she ‘felt it was imperative to provide space immediately to students affected by this incident’.”

Ok… so bananas are racist symbols now. I’ll have to add that to the ever-growing list of insensitive everyday objects, common phrases and words, surnames and historical figures that ought to be avoided like the plague. The biggest question moving forward, will be the scope of Ole Miss’ continued response. Will bananas be banned from campus? Will the university work tirelessly to make more trash cans available to students? Only time will tell. In the meantime, all this banana talk has made me hungry… I promise, I’ll throw the peel in a proper waste receptacle.